Laser poops and Apathy.

I haven’t been posting at all as of late. I can honestly say that I’ve been pretty lazy. This tummy problem I have and a total lack of sleep may have contributed to that lackadaisical attitude of mine. But I’m not going to make excuses for myself.

I’M BACK BABY!!

my tummy still hurts but that’s probably going to be a permanent thing. Apparently if I eat greasy/fatty foods I will have laser poops and feel like I’m getting stabbed in the tum tums.

I mean really… Who the hell has EVER heard of that?! I’m sorry to be using such strong language but my soul is a bit crushed. Do you know what kind of food has grease and fat?… The kinds of food that I enjoy. I mean wtf? really! pfft. psshht. mmmmgaaaahhhh. ok if I think about it anymore my head and taste buds are going to fail me.

I guess this is what happens after 10 years of a diet that is primarily coffee and cigarettes.

This leads me to my other problem. My total apathy.

I no longer put on make-up, my hair is in knots and I’ve almost left the house in sweat pants. ALMOST. (I don’t believe in going into public wearing sweat pants, gumboots, slippers, most name brands or any kind of jersey material with writing on the bum or boobs).

I haven’t written in a few weeks and all I can think about is the spring that is supposed to be here right now. However my baby is happy and because of this I’m happy. I’m just suffering from a lack of interest in anything outside my house.

That’s going to change. I’m going on a vegan cleanse. Baby Boy and I are going to start taking lots of walks and I’m already planning my new garden. I will go out to have fun and start inviting people over to my home.

Also we (my man-child, actual child and I) will be going of a road trip to my hometown in British Columbia.

fun fun.

until tomorrow friends.

Pfft, Creepy Easter Bunnies and Zombie Jesus.

Hello! How was your Easter? Are you full of the brown stuff?(chocolate) Did you find all the little multicolored eggies?Or are there a few left over that will melt/stink up the place?

Like everyone else in the world I really don’t understand Easter but it’s a good excuse to eat a ton of candy and ham.

I did Easter this year, which is the first time since I was a child. My childhood family is a bit different so we never did the dinner or brunch.

However, when I was a kid I did get to hunt for eggs from time to time. I don’t think I ever found them all and when my mom would tell me I was missing a few eggs I would give up, sit down, start crying. This would make me question my hunting abilities and knock my confidence down a notch. (no wonder I have confidence issues). At least while I was crying I could eat yummy chocolate eggs (no wonder I have eating issues).

So as a gift for you and your families on this most wonderful, misunderstood, confusing and soul crushing of holidays I found my favorite creepy Easter bunny photo.

That poor kid!

On another note did you “get” someone with a rad April fools gag?

I did! I pretended that I was going to give my son his bottle then I pulled it away and yelled “APRIL FOOLS”!! He started to cry which made me feel super bad… so I cuddled the heck out of him and told him I was sorry over and over again.

Sooo Yeah.

I will be resuming my daily posts tomorrow!

Peace!